Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
Randomize
