Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
I think a kid would responsible me up
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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