you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
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