SEEEEXXX PLEASE
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
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