Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
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