when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Randomize
