normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
the liver wants what the liver wants
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
Randomize
