I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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