How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Randomize