yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Randomize
