She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
there is glitter all over my balls
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
