you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize
