Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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