id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Randomize