well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
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The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
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We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
is that a dick in a sweater?
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?