OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Randomize
