Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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