you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize
