508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
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