his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
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