He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
