but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
I came so hard my ears popped.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
