these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
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