He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Randomize
