AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
I supernannyed him into submission
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
