so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
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