I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
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