i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize
