i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
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