I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
