i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Randomize