I must be too annoying 4 u.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
