You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
false alarm, still single
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