after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Randomize
