Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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