Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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