Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Randomize
