I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize