Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
My breasts were aching with rage.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
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