someone get that fucking seahorse.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
Randomize
