just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
