we're blogging at a bar
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Randomize
