She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
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