Cold hands, warm shart.
why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
my sisters under your porch take her home
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
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