btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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