Texts From Last Night

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  (518): View more from New York

  Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'

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  (518): Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine' http://tfl.nu/z72n
  Replies (7) Good night (2476) Bad night (468)
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.

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  (910): This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods. http://tfl.nu/a6lo
  Replies (11) Good night (4883) Bad night (959)
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  (310): View more from California

  i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic

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  (310): i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic http://tfl.nu/3sfg
  Replies (5) Good night (3027) Bad night (877)
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  (256): View more from Alabama

  There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him

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  (256): There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him http://tfl.nu/3qir
  Replies (17) Good night (3646) Bad night (930)
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  (708): View more from Illinois

  Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.

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  (708): Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door. http://tfl.nu/qh5i
  Replies (6) Good night (3899) Bad night (821)
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  (319): View more from Iowa

  i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...

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  (319): i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself (612): It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool... http://tfl.nu/lubj
  Replies (7) Good night (2846) Bad night (876)
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  (856): View more from New Jersey

  and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show

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  (856): and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show http://tfl.nu/o1xq
  Replies (4) Good night (3032) Bad night (749)
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  (205): View more from Alabama

  Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails

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  (205): Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails http://tfl.nu/p7in
  Replies (12) Good night (3391) Bad night (862)
• Favorite

  (352): View more from Florida

  Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?

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  (352): Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend? http://tfl.nu/xbp0
  Replies (6) Good night (1984) Bad night (492)
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  (818): View more from California

  So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth

  (323): View more from California

  Gross

  (818): View more from California

  AN ACTUAL PICKLE

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  (818): So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth (323): Gross (818): AN ACTUAL PICKLE http://tfl.nu/hdiy
  Replies (7) Good night (1842) Bad night (515)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards

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  (630): And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards http://tfl.nu/vn30
  Replies (2) Good night (1233) Bad night (330)
• Favorite

  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.

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  (715): We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her. http://tfl.nu/sx8g
  Replies (4) Good night (979) Bad night (287)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.

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  (703): Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out. http://tfl.nu/hcks
  Replies (3) Good night (652) Bad night (451)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.

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  (541): Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back. http://tfl.nu/a3bg
  Replies (5) Good night (564) Bad night (243)
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  (562): View more from California

  When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.

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  (562): When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed. http://tfl.nu/ppx1
  Replies (0) Good night (486) Bad night (171)

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