I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
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