I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
I see more hoeing in ur future
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