Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
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