Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
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